Sometimes during yoga I metamorphize into a little Buddha and have some genius epiphanies (ok, well they're genius to me). Here are some of my thoughts, in word-vomit form, for your reading pleasure.
I'm about to say something really disgusting, so bear with me.
A lot of times when I go to yoga, I spent a good chunk of the time staring at other people. Not in a creepy, demeaning way (well, maybe it's kinda creepy), but more in an envious way. It's hard not to stare when you're in a room full of strong, flexible people and way too many mirrors.
Sometimes I let this envy get the best of me, and I start to get down on myself. I get insecure, staring at myself in the mirror in front of me and losing the focus that yoga really is all about. More often than not, I spend the entire time criticizing my body in every pose from the way my stomach looks in a forward fold to my inability to do a forearm stand.
A lot of times when I go to yoga, I spent a good chunk of the time staring at other people. Not in a creepy, demeaning way (well, maybe it's kinda creepy), but more in an envious way. It's hard not to stare when you're in a room full of strong, flexible people and way too many mirrors.
Sometimes I let this envy get the best of me, and I start to get down on myself. I get insecure, staring at myself in the mirror in front of me and losing the focus that yoga really is all about. More often than not, I spend the entire time criticizing my body in every pose from the way my stomach looks in a forward fold to my inability to do a forearm stand.
Bitch.
What I realized last night, however is that I rarely envy everything about one person. Instead, I pick and choose features that I wish I had: her skinny arms, his strength, her natural tan. It's like I'm playing Ms. Potato Head with other people's features, building a new me until I'm finally satisfied.
I will never actually envy somebody else's entire situation because there are things in my life that are just too precious to give up.
Like these two, for example :-)
The most significant part of this whole epiphany, however, was one simple thought that had never even crossed my mind up until this point.
I have been the target of somebody's envy. I have great qualities that I don't even realize because I take them for granted day after day. And so does everybody else.
So the next time you're feeling down on yourself or envying that skinny b*tch next to you on the subway...
STOP! Because she may be envying you for something that you don't even see. You're bangin' and everybody else knows it, so effing appreciate it, gosh darnit!
Question:
Do you have yoga/spin/life envy? How do you keep it in check?
Woww, I could never hold up myself up like that crazy flexible/strong girl in that photo. I'd be envious of that too.
ReplyDeleteGreat points in this post!